Posts Tagged ‘hope’

comma

Whatever you title is at work, chances are it goes after your name. For instance, I am Marsh Buice, Business Manager-there’s a pause after your name, then your title. There was a time when I said my name..(pause).. followed by General Sales Manager and when I lost that distinction-when I lost my spot, I took it really hard. I took it hard because the title that followed my name didn’t carry the same weight-it didn’t carry the same clout that it once did. It was hard for me to shake-I mean I’d always prided myself that I didn’t care about a title, but it was only once I was stripped of my title that I realized how much of my ego was wrapped up in that title. 

I had to go through a process-a reset, a remolding of sorts, to realize that there’s a comma after my name not a period. Where I found myself one day didn’t mean I had to stay there; instead, I had to think of the moment, as a pause-a pivot for me to re-prioritize things-to accept responsibility, learn from my mistakes, and to forever remain humble. When people that I’d known for years would come in and ask me why I wasn’t sitting in my old spot, without trying to tiptoe or spin a story, I told them I’d gotten demoted. Painfully embarrassing, but necessary. Quick, easy, and no story-line (i.e. lie) to keep up with.

When Oprah sat down with Joe Biden, he said as a Senator and occasionally as Vice President, he rode the subway home every night to be with his sons. He said the ride kept him grounded-in touch with those he represented. He was so common in fact that those who rode the subway with him or lived in the surrounding areas didn’t address him as Senator or Mr. Vice President, they simply called him, “Joe.” Often as VP, his Secret Service Agents would be caught off-guard because people would yell out to him, “Hey Joe, come here!”

Joe stayed with his comma…

Everything is in transition; we all have a comma after our name. You may be on top of the world and everything is falling right in place for you….or maybe you find that you’ve slipped-that you’ve slid to the base of the mountain you once climbed. No matter where you find yourself, realize it’s a comma. You can start to climb again-this time you’ll be better, stronger, more learned that once before.  And if you’re at your Summit of Greatness, remember too that there’s a comma after your name, because you can move in any direction…left, right, up…but also down.

A comma…

…..a pause…a pivot-a press of a worthy pursuit.

It’s important to be thankful…because wherever you are isn’t permanent…it’s grace known as a comma.

I’ll see you on the Blacktop!

Check out the daily 5 min episodes of The Sales Life Podcast

 

image

No words can describe the sensation of walking into a spider web- no matter if you’re running late to pick your child or just mindlessly walking down a hallway, the minute you feel the web of the spider’s silk cling to your face, you freak out. To an observer, it looks as though you’ve suddenly lost your mind. Seizing in terror, you drop everything and begin clawing at your face. After raking your fingers through your scalp and swatting your body, you end up looking like the lead singer of a big-haired 80’s rock band who slept in his car all night. In short, you look a hot mess.

When you walk through a spider web, what do you fear most, the spider or the web? If you’re anything like me, you fear the end result, the spider. In my mind’s eye, I can see a pissed off spider, in retaliation for my destroying its web work-of-art, scurrying down my shirt collar, biting my neck, poisoning my bloodstream, and killing me instantly-leaving behind my wife and 4 kids. Wow, in a matter of seconds, I go from minding my own business, to that of destruction and death. And it’s all a lie.

 Out of a population of over 316 million Americans, fewer than 7 people die from a spider bite each year. (That’s a .0000000221319% chance by the way). Actually, you’re 8x more likely to die from a bee sting than from a spider bite. What you feel is real, but what you fear is not.

Isn’t this what usually happens in life? One minute you’re strolling through life and suddenly you become entangled in one of life’s unseen webs. A turning economy destroys your credit and pushes you into bankruptcy; after 25 years of being married to, who you thought was your best friend, is ending in divorce; after literally giving everything to your career-missing countless dinner dates, birthday parties, recitals, and basketball games, your employer suddenly eliminates your position-leaving you to pick up the fragments of your once thriving career. Bullying, discrimination, errant choices –it doesn’t matter because life’s webs do not discriminate-we all walk through them.

But the webs in your life are temporary, not terminal. Yes, what you are going through sucks-often it feels as if there is no end in site, but the good times aren’t final nor are these bad times fatal. Every darkness ends in sunrise; there is healing on the other side of this hurt. You will get through this because…

…there is no spider in your web.

In his book, When Bad Things Happen To Good People, Harold Kushner tells of an old Chinese tale of a woman whose only son had died.

 ”In her grief, she went to the holy man and said, “What prayers, what magical incantations do you have to bring my son back to life?” Instead of sending her away or reasoning with her, he said to her, “Fetch me a mustard seed from a home that has never known sorrow. We will use it to drive the sorrow out of your life.” The woman set off at once in search of the magical mustard seed. She came first to a splendid mansion, knocked at the door and said, “I am looking for a home that has never known sorrow. Is this such a place? It is very important to me.” They told her, “You’ve certainly come to the wrong place,” and began to describe all the tragic things that had recently befallen on them. The woman said to herself, “Who is better to help these poor unfortunate people than I, who have had misfortune of my own.” 

After comforting one family, the lady continued on her journey in search for the magical mustard seed, but every palace and home she turned to was another story of hardships and misfortunes. “Ultimately she became so involved in ministering to other people’s griefs that she forgot about her quest for the magical mustard seed-never realizing that it had in fact driven the sorrow out of her own life.” 

From the richest to the destitute, when it comes to problems, we’re all on the same ship-just different decks. Even though what you are going through right now may seem unfair or unjust, there’s someone, somewhere who would gladly swap their problems for yours. It’s not to diminish the fact that what you are facing-albeit a financial hardship, strained relationship, sales slump, or maybe even something greater, isn’t painful, but understand that what you are going through today will not remain a problem forever. Rather than focusing only on your problems, use them instead to fuel the possibilities. Seek the opportunity to help others who are walking on the path that you once traveled. Let them know that they are not alone on their journey-you made it through and so can they.  Their road is less ominous when you become the light. Interestingly when you become the light to others, you in turn become the light to yourself. 

Lift your perspective to look at life not as a closure, but more as a series of detours. Behind every problem rests the opportunity-look for it. 

 

Scrambled eggs can’t be undone. Neither can your past. The only guarantee in your life is right now. Often we focus on the tiny rearview mirror affectionately known as our past, instead of being fixated on the large windshield of our future. You can’t be bitter and sweet, you can’t be hot and cold, neither can you move backward and expect to advance forward in your life. Sometimes we become stuck because we like it. Not because it is enjoyable, but because it is familiar-we always gravitate toward familiarity. T.W.O. is irreversible-no exchanges, no refunds, no store credit. Each instance, Time, Words, and Opportunity are issued only once. When they are spent, they are gone forever. Spend the currency of T.W.O. carefully and make each one count. Your brightest days are in front of you-what got you where you are today can’t be undone. What got you “there” tomorrow, next month, or next year is up to you. Move forward, your destiny awaits you.