Archive for the ‘Meaning’ Category

Dear World,

We’ve been through a lot together over the decades you and I-marriages, births, deaths, fulfillment & disappointment, war & peace, good times & hard times. There were days when you were more generous to me than I could possibly have deserved. And there were days when you cheated me out of things I felt I was entitled to. There were days when you looked so achingly beautiful that I could hardly believe you were mine, and days when you broke my heart and reduced me to tears. But with it all, I chose to love you, whether you deserve it or not. (& how does one measure that?) I love you because I like who I am better when I do. But mostly I love you because loving you makes it easier for me to be grateful for today and hopeful about tomorrow. Love does that. 

Faithfully yours, 

Harold Kushner

This beautiful letter came at the end of Kushner’s book “9 Essential Things I Learned About Life.” 

(Hear what this letter means to me on my podcast The Sales Life

Strange how Life can be a mixture of such vast emotions right?

…some days there aren’t enough words to express just how wonderful things are…other days there are no words that can adequately describe just how broken we’ve become. One day we’re on high…other days we’ve painfully discovered rock bottom has many levels.

Whatever it is…however it is…it’s your world…love it no matter what. Hard to do some days I know…but it’s the only one you’ve got…and you’ll be better when you do.

Just  remember it could always be better…but it too could be much worse.

I had a salesperson that I just couldn’t seem to get her to work with more customers- being she was new, I would repeatedly emphasize to her to work with more customers, but when they would come in, she’d usually fall back & let another salesperson Up (catch) them. I couldn’t figure it out..she knew her product, she was technically sound, & she was used to competing against the boys because she came from a male dominated industry …so what was it? When asked, she responded, “Marsh, I don’t have a huge need- the other salespeople around me have to struggle to make a sale in order to pay rent & car notes- I don’t have a huge need so I don’t need to make much.” Leaning back I asked her, “So what’s your end game…” to that she told me that she planned on being in the car business a long time. “Then if that’s the case, you’re not doing yourself much good- here’s why…

First, you can’t teach what you don’t know & you’ll never know until you first do. In his biography, Arnold Schwarzenegger said the 3 keys to him becoming a 7x Mr Olympia, successful businessman, & one of the highest paid actors at the time in Hollywood were reps, reps, reps.”

Reps weatherproof your career. You’ve got to work with hundreds of experiences, objections, scenarios, & obstacles while fading & maneuvering through thousands of rejections not only so that you can learn, but so that you can pay it forward and help others succeed who are starting out as well. Reps also give your customers the needed assurances that you can help them with their current situation because you’ve helped other customers maneuver through similar circumstances as well.

This brings me to my 2nd point,” I told her, “When you’re not working with enough customers, not only do you not possess enough of the necessary skills that they desire & deserve, but not working with enough customers means that you’re OK with them buying from an inferior salesperson- if you say that you’re here to help customers, then you’ve got to follow through with actions to those words.”

Which brings me to my 3rd point,” I quipped, “Do you have kids?” She told me that she had a boy and a girl- Mason & Madison…”Do you want them to do well in life,” I asked knowing she’d say yes. “If you want them to do well, then be their teacher- set the example because they can’t be what they don’t see. The reason why so many struggle as adults today is because, no one played the part…no one showed them the pattern… no one chalked the outline, nor showed them what they could be because no one helped them see…no one showed them more so they’ve accepted less.”

You must do well…you must reach beyond your comfort zone…you must dig deep and get back up…you must set audacious goals & kick the door in when Life tries to slam it in your face…you must reach higher because this isn’t just about you.

It’s way bigger than that…

….but first you’ve got to set the bar.

I’ll see you on the Blacktop.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Humps, roadblocks, …detours are a part of life, but they’re humps not Himalayas. Sometimes we get to a hump in Life & we turn the hump instantly into a Himalaya- the hump we face goes from waist deep in reality to a 22,338 foot mountain in our minds.

Soooo many things in Life are humps miraged as a mountain. They look that way to us for a couple of reasons: 1) It’s something that we’ve never faced before so we think that we’re no match for it. 2) We’ve faced a similar situation before & resulted in a shit sandwich- so we think we’re about to eat another. It’s all Bullshit.

Isn’t it crazy how we have a Redbox Rental state of mind sometimes?! You know the Redbox rental that’s right outside the store where you can rent a DVD for less than 2 bucks? We rent our problems much the same way- we walk our happy asses to the box covers of Life’s problems & we select a cheap B Flick negative rental and we play that negative movie, over & over in our minds. It’s impossible working for something to positively manifest while thinking something negative.

Look,you may be facing some big mountains in your life- no doubt, but I am telling you that you need to look at your problems through different lenses. First, stop calling it a “problem-” I call them challenges, Eckhart Tolle calls them situations. Whatever you call it, call it something other than a “problem” because often the mere utterance of the word problem stunts us right in our tracks- 1 minute we’re galloping through Life & the next scene we’re like Lt. Dan from Forest Gump, flailing around handicapped with our legs blown off. Try using the word challenge or situation & watch your whole perspective change. Your mind will shift to that of a solution mindset and will begin looking for ways to solve it by tinkering and poking at the situation.

The 2nd thing I want you to realize is that mountain that you’re facing is nothing more than a bunch of humps stuck together- they’re like big words…I tell my daughter all the time that big words are nothing more than small words clumped together. Break the bigness down- declump those ganged up humps…you don’t get to the summit in one leap.

So back to the beginning…

Humps, detours, & roadblocks are necessary in life-they’re needed for you to grow- I mean think about it, would you voluntarily subject yourself to pain, hardship, embarrassment, recourse, and ridicule? Hell my hands would be in my pocket and sure as hell not raised to be subjected to the harshnesses of Life, but we need the stimulation- i.e. kicked in the ass, in order to grow. I don’t like it any more than you do, but I know in retrospect I’ve liked who I’ve become and what I’ve accomplished on the other side of the bleakness. Yes it was painful…yes it was lonely & dark… no it wasn’t fair…but it was necessary. There isn’t a single one of us reading this that cannot look back at some cataclysmic event and not say yes it was hard, but I learned so much.

So I need you to do 2 things: 1rst charge the mountains in your Life one hump at a time..and (2), don’t look at every hump as a Himalaya.

You’ve got this!

I’ll see you on the Blacktop!

(HT to Deepak Chopra)

Many times when we miss a result we get discouraged don’t we? In sales when you’re working with a customer for hours, days, even months only to result in not making a deal(!!!)… you get discouraged…you get down…you get frustrated because you “missed” a sale. Or say you tried out for a team, submitted a paper for publishing, posted a blog, called on a new client, or had a one on one meeting with an advisor for school, counselor for your kids, or just someone that you needed a favorable outcome with and you didn’t to get it… you may think that you missed, but you didn’t …because what you “missed” actually becomes your momentum.

I tell my sales people all the time to feed the machine – meaning feed the action… feed the effort… if you feed it, the results will show and when they don’t “show”… when you feel that you missed, I want you to look at it differently. Look at it as momentum-at least you’re taking action, hell most people don’t even do that… they just sit and hope that something will come around, but hope is not a strategy. Look, I’d rather you try and fail than succeed and never trying because the action that you took- no it didn’t result in a cashable outcome, but it does still have value.… it’s called Feedback.

Feedback is a good thing…good or “bad”…favorable or “unfavorable,” use the feedback to tweak and refine your next approach, phone call, meeting, or submission.

Feedback is the noise that you get back – the bounce back from the effort that you made. Musicians know all about feedback… when they get on stage they do a sound check because sometimes their mic gives that deafening ring – that’s Feedback and the sound engineer makes the necessary adjustments so the sound comes out clear and crisp when they get ready to perform…your process needs to be the same way. When you step onto the stage with a customer…when you step onto the grand stage of Life– sure your initial try may be ear piercing feedback, but make the necessary adjustments….

Musicians don’t walk off stage due to an foul sound- no they adjust- not only initially but all throughout the performance… so should you…

Whether you’re slaying it today or just flat ass bombing, make the adjustments with the feedback that you’re receiving – don’t personalize or internalize it, just keep working it…

…& if you “miss” the result keep in mind that you made the momentum. Make the adjustments and keep on rocking.

I’ll see you on the Blacktop.

***Catch & subscribe to my daily 5 min podcast The Sales Life w Marsh Buice on iTunes or anchor.fm

You may think that because Steve Young was a Super Bowl wining quarterback, Hall of Fame inductee, attorney, & successful sports analyst that he just had the “it” factor- like everything he touched turned to gold but that couldn’t be further from the truth. He went to BYU as a quarterback and realized quickly that he wasn’t going to be a starter anytime soon…if ever. The starting QB Jim McMahon (Future Super Bowl winner) had the lead position locked in- not only was Young behind McMahon, but he was behind 6 others vying for the coveted QB position. In other words, 7 others players would have to go down before Young would ever get his shot. Steve began to have second thoughts- he wished he would’ve gone to a different college so he called his dad (nicknamed Grit) telling him that he wanted to quit. Grit told his son that he could certainly quit, but he couldn’t come home, saying, “I don’t live with quitters.”

Steve stuck it out…

To make matters worse, Steve’s coach walks up to him one day informing him that Steve was no longer a QB, he’d been demoted to defense. “I don’t coach lefties,” his coach walked off saying. Sure enough, Steve found out that every BYU Hall of Fame QB had been right handed- Steve Young was a leftie.

Given Young’s already brittle state of mind, that statement alone could’ve broken him…instead it motivated him. Although his position was now on defense, Young was determined to play quarterback. He set out on his own by working on his footwork, technique, & threw over 10,000 spirals in 2 months time. His arm hurt- he was putting in extra work for a position he didn’t even play…

But he kept at it…

A new coach meandering across the field saw the accuracy of Young’s throws & began lobbying to get him switched over to offense. Steve’s hard worked paid off…sort of…although he was back to the 8th QB, at least he was back on offense. With new hope, he began outworking others and moved through the ranks to the #2 spot. As “luck” would have it, the starter went down, and Young went in.

Now I’d like to tell you the rest was history and it was all cupcakes and rainbows from there but it wasn’t. Steve played awful- in one half alone he threw 5 interceptions… in a short amount of time, Young had racked up more losses than McMahon had amassed in 2 years.

But he kept at it…

Drafted by the Tampa Bay Bucs, he played poorly for 2 seasons, but once again someone saw a diamond playing in the rough. Bill Walsh, Head Coach of the San Francisco 49ers, brought Steve Young on board to back up legendary quarterback Joe Montana.

Back on the bench again, the role and mission were all too familiar and Young used his secondary role to study & learn from one of the greatest quarterbacks ever. Montana & Young competed and jostled for the starting role-at one point, Young was relegated to a backup position when he was told he would be a starter.

But he kept at it…

Young got his shot, secured the starting position and went on to become Super Bowl MVP, Hall of Famer, attorney, & sports analyst for ESPN.

Nothing for Young came easy- even when he earned it, he found himself always having to prove himself…not so much to others, but to himself.

Steve Young kept at it…

…and so should you…..

Anything worth having will be hard. At times it’ll be thankless & humiliating… but it’ll all be worth it…some how, some way. While you may be deep on the depth chart in life-just because you’re not in the lead position…just because you’re not a starter doesn’t mean you shouldn’t think, study, & play like one. Don’t play up to the position you find yourself in today, play to your potential. Do the offline work- work that is meaningless to everyone but you…learn from those you back up-good or bad, don’t stand around hoping they fall, help them rise & in return you will too. Put in the work not knowing when “the day” will arrive- when is not your concern…what you do between now and when is. You put in the effort & the universe will supply the events and people to ensure it “just so” happens. And often it happens beyond your wildest imagination.

But first you’ve got to play to your potential, not your current position.

I’ll see you on the Blacktop.

creditcard

So I’m at the grocery store and the lady tallies up my-what I went in for two items and came out with a basket full of items and I reach into my wallet only to realize my ATM card is missing. You know that feeling-the heart pounding, cold sweat feeling you get when you begin to imagine that some dude is at Footlocker and soon will be heading to Forever 21 for his boo and he’s doing it all on your dime-at least for the moment anyway. As my nerves settle, I realize that I have fraud protection and once I initiate the claim, they’ll eventually reverse my charges.

But what about you?

Everything you’ve worked so hard for-mentally, spiritually, physically…financially-multiple accounts that have taken you years to build up…

Imagine as if you’ve got a big magnetic strip on you and you’re letting people and events make unauthorized charges on your emotional, physical, spiritual, and financial well-being.

Be careful who you let into your life-who you let snuggle up, lean in, and ride shotgun in your life. They may be making unauthorized charges…swiping…pulling threads from the fabric of your life. Even some clients-the ones who seem that there is no pleasing them are swiping…incessantly draining your emotional accounts when you could be using your resources for others..

…your employer, family, “friends,” co-workers-hell even the Capital One credit card…

Watch for leaks…

Energy draining leaks-those people and events that seem to suck the life right out of you-debiting you of your energy…often these swipes are small, incremental charges that seem like minuscule infractions only to realize-often too late, that you’re drained, overdrawn and operating in the red. Financially, if there’s some things you just cannot pay-I mean no way, no how-pay your essentials-pay your rent, insurance, car note, day care, and buy groceries to sustain your storm..and if you’ve got to let a bill ride, then hell let it ride. I know you don’t like it…I know you’ve busted your ass to have good credit, but you’ll get it back. If it can go down, then it can surely go back up. I’d rather you be 30 days late than cut your life 10 years short with panic attacks and depression.

The reason why you’re so exhausted..the reason why you have no idea how you got home..the reason why you have no clue what your daughter told you what happened at school today or the fact that you’re just too tired to eat macaroni and cheese is because you’ve let too much drain you-too many of the wrong things..too many of the wrong messages have pulled on you making unauthorized charges on a priceless account…

You…

Watch for leaks today. Make sure the right energy comes back to you-if not-even if it’s a close, love one…

Deny the charges.

I’ll see you next time on the Blacktop!

P.S. Take me with you! Did you know I have a daily podcast? Subscribe to The Sales Life w Marsh Buice (found on iTunes) right here and you’ll get a daily 5 minute dose of positivity.

When Dr. Howard Thurman- philosopher, educator, minister, & mentor to Martin Luther King & Mahatma Gandhi, took his young children back to his hometown of Daytona Beach, his girls saw a nearby playground and asked to go swing. “You can’t swing on those swings,” said Thurman.

He promised them that he would explain more once they got home…Dr. Thurman had to buy some time because he was at a crossroads- a moment that I’m sure every black parent faced during those times (& still in some respects today)…

….how do you tell your children they can’t play on a “White’s only” playground.

Later he sat his girls down and told them that they were important…so important in fact that they couldn’t swing on those “public swings,” because the “public”only consisted of white children. He said, “You’re so important that it takes the state legislature, courts, sheriffs, white churches, bankers, & businesses-it takes the majority of the white people in Florida to keep 2 little black girls from swinging on those swings.”

Check out & subscribe to my daily 5 min episodes of The Sales Life Podcast

Dr. Thurman reframed the racial inequality he and his family were facing. He reframed the hatred and racism and made it a bridge instead of a barrier. He calibrated his daughters to-yes, see the injustice for what it is, but encouraged them to keep on going- to not let someone else’s opinions, narrow-mindedness, and blatant ignorance be the force of limitation for their lives.

Yes… there will be opposition, but maybe you’re facing opposition because what you are doing is of such magnitude- of such great importance, that those who oppose you are so fearful of you reaching your pinnacle, that they’ll stop at almost nothing to see you not succeed.

Importance is not some, Life’s good…I have no problems…kind of seance- no, Importance is recognizing the significance & impact that you are making and not letting up, giving in, throwing the towel, nor raising the flag.

It’s passages like this that remind me that I need to tell my children how important they are- not just to me, but to the whole world. My son is going through his first love breakup and while it’s incredibly painful to watch, I have to sit on the foot of his bed, rub his back, and remind him that maybe his boo can’t handle all of his awesomeness. His importance is irrelevant to the opinions of others.

We’ve got to remind salespeople, coworkers, & family members that some wrinkles in time are due to the fact that Life chose you…not because you’re weak, but because you are strong… Life deemed you worthy to enough-competent enough to fight this war you’re in. Not everyone can handle it…. but you can.

Whatever you face today, never underestimate your importance. The greater the opposition the greater your importance.

….Keep going.

I’ll see you on the Blacktop.